


your hands in mine

by divinerose



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Birthday, Fluff, M/M, POV Alternating, slight angst ?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-07
Updated: 2017-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-11 17:25:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12940128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/divinerose/pseuds/divinerose
Summary: It's Yuzuru's first birthday in Toronto. Javier wants to make it special.





	your hands in mine

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to write something for Yuzuru's birthday especially because this is his first one in a while not at the GPF (;___;) so that's how this came about. I haven't written in a while so I hope this is ok!!

The last note of Chopin rings loud and clear in the arena. For a second, there’s absolute silence. And then it breaks.

 

The audience can’t get on their feet fast enough as they roar their approval. The applause is positively thunderous, and the noise of it, combined with the sound of plastic wrapping hitting the ice as gifts rain down, is almost deafening.

 

Yuzuru loves it.

 

He’s done it again. He’s skated a short program even better than the one back in September and for the first time this season Yuzuru feels thrilled.

 

He takes his bows, thanking the audience for their support. As he makes his way off the ice Brian greets him with a crushing hug.

 

“Boy what a way to end your birthday!”

 

Yuzuru beams. He makes his way to the kiss and cry, waving to the fans cheering above. He knows the score will be big. It has to be. He made sure he didn’t miss any levels on his spins, and he paid extra attention to his edges in his step sequence.

 

“The scores for Yuzuru Hanyu of Japan,”

 

He waits eagerly, his entire body coiled like a spring, ready to jump.

 

“Yuzuru Hanyu’s short program score is-” the numbers come up on the screen, the audience screams, and Brian is grinning, shaking his head in disbelief.

 

Yuzuru squints. The numbers look blurry, why are they blurry? The announcer’s voice sounds garbled, almost as if he were underwater, and he can’t make out the words he’s saying. Everywhere people are on their feet, some fans are crying, others are proudly waving their flags and banners. Yuzuru wants to tell everyone to be quiet, he can’t focus with all the yelling.  He just wants to know his scores. Why doesn’t he know his scores?

 

In the distance, Yuzuru hears a faint ringing. He looks around in confusion. The ringing gets louder, but no one seems to notice. Yuzuru reaches his hands out, planning to tell the audience to lower their voices so he can distinguish where the noise is coming from.

 

It’s the crash that jolts him awake.

 

Yuzuru’s head snaps to his bedside table. His arms had reached out and knocked his alarm clock to the floor, which is still ringing incessantly.

 

He throws his pillow over his face and groans.

Of course it was a dream. Of course he’s still in Toronto instead of Japan. Of course he’s here, lying in bed, while everyone else is on the ice halfway across the ice, warming up for their short program.

 

Yuzuru gets up, pressing the power button on his alarm a little too harshly before flopping back into his bed.

 

His mind is racing, replaying his dream over and over again. He had been so close to making it a reality, so close to qualifying and defending his title for the fifth time.

 

All it took was one fall.

 

Yuzuru shakes his head. He can’t do this to himself again. He knows he’s one step away from falling back into a seemingly endless spiral of what if's and what could have been's. Lamenting over the past won't change anything. He knows that, he just needs to remind himself of it every now and then.

 

He gets up. He has bigger goals than this, and he's not going to reach them lying in bed.

 

***

 

He's a couple of blocks away from the rink when he sees it.

 

It's bright, is the first thing he thinks. Almost too bright in comparison to the gray bus stop its displayed on. You'd think he'd be used to seeing his face on giant posters, given how many of them are put up in Japan. But this is different. This is Canada. The people here don't know him, they don't think twice about the Japanese boy on the metro, with his wireless headphones and his gray suitcase by his side.

 

It's a picture of him in his Chopin costume, taken from back when he competed in Russia earlier this season. On the bottom, in elegant script, is a happy birthday message for him.

 

Suddenly, Yuzuru feels a slight flush on the back of his neck. He glances around, hoping no one has made the connection between him and the poster. He's grateful for the gesture, of course he is, but the one place Yuzuru likes to draw attention to himself is on the ice. Outside of that he prefers to lie low, away from the watchful eyes of everyone.

 

He takes out his phone, snapping a quick picture of the sign before resuming his walk.

 

He feels odd as he continues to make his way to the rink. The thing is, he’s 23 but he doesn’t really know how to feel about it. In skating years, some might call him old. In adult years, he’s just starting out, getting his feet wet if you will.

 

He knows he's accomplished much already, but at the same time, he feels there's still so much left, so much he hasn't done. And yet, time, like sand, is slipping right through his fingers.

 

Yuzuru had planned out his whole life up until now. He knew exactly what he wanted to, and how he was going to accomplish it. And now it feels like he’s hit a fork in the road, and he doesn’t know which one to take. More and more people keep asking him what he wants to do, and Yuzuru doesn’t know.

 

He sighs. He can’t not know forever. Eventually he’ll have to consider his options. But he won’t worry about it today, it is his birthday after all.

 

***

Javier is worried.

 

No, he's more than worried. He's panicking. There's 5 minutes left until Yuzuru gets off the ice and everything is wrong.

 

Why did he think this was a good idea? Why did he think he could do it? And why on earth did no one stop him from buying those Winnie the Pooh balloons?

 

"He is going to be here right? He can't just leave without walking through the lobby, not that that’s physically possible anyways," Javier nervously babbles to Brian. His coach just laughs.

 

"Javi, we left him out on the ice all alone. The last thing he's going to do is get off early."

 

"Right, but-"

 

A hand squeezes his shoulder. "Javi, breathe." It's Tracy, smiling her warm motherly smile that always makes problems seem less worrisome.

 

"Everything looks great, you really outdid yourself" she says, giving him another shoulder squeeze.

 

Javier takes a deep breath. Tracy's right. He doesn't need to overreact. The place does look nice, well, as nice as the lobby of a skating rink can be. And everyone wanted to get involved and help out, he'd call that successful.

 

One of the younger skaters who had been staring at the window looking out into the rink squeals, "He's coming, he's coming!"

 

Javier's stomach drops to the floor.

 

_Oh god._

 

***

Yuzuru gives the ice a gentle tap before stepping off, sliding his guards on and making his way to the locker room.

 

He had a productive session, his stamina during his free skate was getting better, and his jumps were getting back to the level they were at in Russia.

 

Well. He grimaces, remembering his fall on the quad loop, almost all his jumps.

 

Still, he's making progress. He mulls over the corrections Brian had given him as he dries his blades. making a mental note to jot them down in his notebook when he gets home.

 

He finishes putting his skates in his bag, stuffing Pooh in as well before zipping it closed. As he makes his way out of the locker room, he notes the state of the ice. Normally the zamboni would have resurfaced the ice by now, and the skaters would be on warming up with their stroking exercises. But the ice looks the same as when he left it, and there's no one to be seen. It's suspicious, but he's witnessed stranger things.

 

He pulls out his phone and begins to find a playlist for his trek home. His eyes are on the screen as he opens the door to the lobby, so he doesn't notice the crowd of faces waiting for him expectantly.

 

"SURPRISE!"

 

Yuzuru jumps, startled, his phone almost tumbling out of his hand. There, staring at him, is the entirety of the Cricket Club. All the skaters, the coaches, the receptionists, even a couple of the zamboni drivers.

 

His eyes find those of his mom, who is standing in the corner, trying to hide her smile at her son's confused state.

 

"For me?"  He mouths to her.

 

She nods.

 

He slowly begins to process the situation as his eyes scan the room. There, hanging in the back of the room, is a banner with the words "Happy Birthday Yuzu!" in bold print. The entire room is covered with gold streamers, akin to the ones that covered the ice during the Rostelecom Cup gala. Balloons are scattered throughout the room as well, a pair of which are the shape of the numbers 2 and 3.

 

Yuzuru's eyes start to focus on all the different faces surrounding him. There's Brian and Tracy, grinning widely like two proud parents. Next to them are Gabby, David, Javi-

 

His eyes stop, resting on Javier. He's fidgeting, and his smile doesn't quite hide his nerves.

 

Yuzuru is about to say something, he’s probably been quiet for far too long, but then, he spots it.

 

There, on the center of a white, cloth covered table, lies his birthday cake. Yuzuru stares. His eyes flicker over towards Javier for a second, before going back to the cake. And then he stares some more.

 

His mind flashes to all the cakes he’s received over the years, most of them skating related, none of them like this.

 

Maybe it’s because of the dream he had that morning, or maybe it’s because of the way his mind wandered during his commute, thinking about what the future held for him. Whatever the reason is, Yuzuru, to his great horror, finds that there’s a lump in his throat, and his vision has blurred slightly.

 

He curses himself for putting Pooh away. He's going to need a tissue in a moment.

 

It’s then that Tracy steps forward, sensing his situation. She gives him a tight hug, and Yuzuru feels himself calm down slightly.

 

She gives him a reassuring smile as she lets go, and turns to address the now expectant crowd.

 

“Well folks, it looks like we left him speechless!”

 

The slight tension breaks, everyone laughs and begins to crowd around Yuzuru, wishing him a happy birthday.

 

Yuzuru makes a mental note to buy Tracy flowers.

 

***

Javier swears he's going to die of nerves when Yuzuru walks through the door. He's so nervous, in fact, that he almost forgets to yell surprise, which is the whole reason why he's in this situation in the first place.

 

Yuzuru jumps, of course he does, before turning over to Yumi, as if to clarify that everyone is indeed gathered here for him.

 

Javier stares at Yuzuru as he scans the room, carefully gauging his reaction. He sees Yuzuru's eyes take in the room, the banner, the streamers, the pile of presents neatly stacked in the corner, all wrapped in colorful paper. Finally, Yuzuru turns to them. He looks at the coaches, the skaters, and then, him.

 

Javier tries to smile when Yuzuru's eyes reach him, but he's not exactly sure what expression his face ends up making.

 

Yuzuru looks as if he's about to speak when he's distracted by the cake.

 

Ah yes. The cake.

 

The cake that Javier lost sleep over, the cake that he spent hours designing, making sure it was perfect.

 

It's a large standard sheet cake. But, printed on the cake, are several pictures. 22 of them to be exact- each one depicting a year of Yuzuru's life.

 

Javier had been nervous presenting his idea to Yumi, but she had been delighted to help. Together they flipped through photo album after photo album, trying to gather pictures of Yuzuru at each age. Yumi had called Yuzuru's father and sister back in Japan too, asking them to send over any pictures they might have.

 

Of course, there were some albums missing, memories that had been lost amidst the rubble of the earthquake. Javier almost considered switching plans and creating a new cake. But thank god for Japanese media and their penchant for filming any young skater with signs of promise; they had provided a lot of the missing footage of Yuzuru for several of the years.

 

Across the surface of the cake, the pictures are laid out like a path, ending at a small figurine- a silhouette of Yuzuru in his ending pose for Seimei. Above all the pictures are the words "A Champion's Journey" and, at the corner of the cake, a "Happy 23rd Birthday Yuzuru" is written out.

 

Javier has to say, if all else goes wrong, at least the cake looks pretty damn good.

 

He looks over at Yuzuru, hoping he's pleased with it. What he's not expecting to see though, is Yuzuru on the verge of tears.

 

Shoot. Shoot, shoot, _shoot_.

 

Did he get it all wrong? What if Yuzuru didn't even want to celebrate his birthday? What if he's one of those people that's always had a negative perception of birthdays, and prefers never to celebrate them? Or, what if he did want to celebrate, what if he already had plans and now Javier's gone and messed it all up by assuming that Yuzuru would've liked all of this? Oh god what has he done? Yuzuru is going to hate Javier forever and they're never going to talk again and Javier's going to end up moving to Antarctica and spend the rest of his days living amongst the penguins in the bitter cold and he's not prepared for that he's from Spain he needs his warmth and-

 

Tracy saves the day.

 

Whatever is going through Yuzuru’s head, she understands, and she dispels the tension that had settled over the room with one quick comment.

 

All at once the skaters begin to crowd around Yuzuru, each of them wishing him a happy birthday.

 

Javier hangs back, watching Yuzuru hug and thank everyone. He looks happy. Genuinely happy. Maybe Javier didn't mess it up after all.

 

It's a few minutes later that Yuzuru finally approaches him, a thoughtful look on his face.

 

"You did this."

 

It's not a question. Yuzuru knows.

 

"I did"

 

Javier focuses on the sleeves of his jacket, tugging them up over his hands.

 

"Thank you"

 

He looks up. It's different from the thank you’s Yuzuru was giving at the front of the room. This one's softer, warmer, Javier sort of wants to capture it in a jar and never let it go.

 

“Did-“ he hesitates, not sure if he had overstepped with the idea of the cake, “did you like the cake?”

 

Yuzuru looks down, smiling softly. When he looks back up, his eyes are bright, so bright that it almost leaves Javier dizzy.

 

“Yes, it’s perfect, best cake ever,” he sends a winning smile at Javier, “but, how?”

 

"Your mom and I looked through old albums to find the pictures, and anything we couldn't find was kindly provided to us by the media in Japan"

 

At this, Yuzuru flushes.

 

"Don't worry, I'll make sure these pictures don't get out. After all, we wouldn't want a happy birthday sign with you in diapers hanging up at the bus stop next year now would we?" Javier teased.

 

Yuzuru buries his face in his hands, the tips of his ears turning pink. "You saw?"

 

Javier laughs, "I'm pretty sure we've all seen it by now. Don't worry, I'm sure most people won't think too much about it," he reaches out to squeeze Yuzuru's arm, hoping to ease some of his embarrassment.

 

Yuzuru looks up from his hands at that. "Oh that reminds me, I must show mom, I took picture of sign to show her." He gives one last smile before leaving, his cheeks still holding a rosy tint.

 

Javier watches him fondly. He knew Yuzuru was upset about not being in Japan for the Final. He would have celebrated his birthday there too, for the fifth year in a row. That's why Javier had wanted to make this special. He wanted Yuzuru to know that even though the circumstances were different, his birthday was still special, still a day to be celebrated. Of course Javier's sad he's missing out on the Final too. But seeing Yuzuru smile brightly, his eyes crinkling at the corners, is enough to make him forget about it.  

 

A hand claps his back. Javier turns to find Brian, who's smiling widely.

 

"You did well, Javi."

 

 _Yeah_ , he thinks, looking over at Yuzuru rambling in Japanese to his mother, his eyes alight. _I guess I did._

 

***

 

A couple hours later, Yuzuru's surprise party starts to dwindle down.

 

The cake had been sliced and pictures had been taken. The skaters had begun to either head back to training or make their way home.

 

Yuzuru looks through all the multiple pictures he took on his phone. Gabby had insisted he take one with the numbered balloons.

 

"But everyone already knows I'm 23" he had complained, looking up at the large '23' balloons floating above him.

 

"But you have to Yuzu, it's a classic birthday shot!"

 

Yuzuru sighed, twirling the strings of the balloons around his hands before posing.

 

He shakes his head. Gabby better not share those. He's sure Japan would have a field day if they got their hands on them.

 

He comes across the pictures he took of the cake. He hadn't let anybody cut it until he was done taking in all the details and snapping pictures from all angles.

 

Yuzuru knows that one of the things people admire about him is his perseverance. His ability to rise despite any and all challenges presented to him. Seeing his life laid out in front of him, Yuzuru began to realize just how much he had overcome. His life hasn't been easy, but Yuzuru knows there's people leading lives more difficult than his own, and so he hasn't complained. He's hit rough patches, he knows that, but somehow he's still here. Somehow, the little boy standing atop the Junior Worlds podium in picture 15 made his way to the top of the Olympic podium in picture 18. 

 

Maybe that's why he teared up looking at it. Maybe the swell of emotion he felt crashing over him as he took it all in was partly due to him realizing that he's come so far, and he still has more to go.

 

He looks over to Javier. He's clearing up plates and napkins that have been left behind. Yuzuru makes his way over.

 

"I can help," he says as he begins to pick up.

 

"Oh no it's ok, go on, keep celebrating," Javier assures him.

 

Yuzuru shakes his head, "I will help."

 

Javier gives him a soft smile, one that makes Yuzuru feel like the ground beneath his feet has given way.

 

He steals glances at Javier as he clears the table, blushing slightly when he’s caught looking a couple times. He feels an overwhelming sense of gratitude for Javier. He didn’t have to plan this; he didn’t have to do anything at all, and yet he did.

 

When Yuzuru first arrived to Toronto, he shut himself out. He would go straight to the rink and then straight back home, rarely interacting with others.

 

And then he met Javier.

 

Javier, the loud, rambunctious Spanish skater with a grin warmer than hot chocolate on a cold winter’s day. Javier, who thrives in social situations, preferring the company of others rather than that of his own mind.

 

He coaxed Yuzuru out of his shell, encouraging him to open up, but never forcing him to if he wasn’t ready. Slowly, gradually, it worked. Javier went from being a skater he shared the ice with to his most trusted confidant.

 

If Yuzuru was asked to name all the ways that Javier had helped him, his list would be miles long. Javier is a constant in his life. When Yuzuru fumbles in the dark, blindly stumbling around, Javier is the light that takes his hand, guiding him along the safest path. When Yuzuru begins to fly upwards too fast, the atmosphere thinning and making it hard to breathe, Javier is there, bringing him back to solid ground. When the pressure is too much, feeling like a boulder crushing his lungs, Javier is next to him, relieving some of the weight.

 

Javier made Yuzuru a better person, and Yuzuru is still trying to find a way to repay that debt.

 

Yuzuru remains deep in thought as they finish cleaning up, and by the time they're done, the lobby is empty.

 

"Well," Javier says, as he throws out the remaining trash, "I hope you liked it."

 

"I loved it, thank you Javi." Yuzuru wishes he could switch over to Japanese and properly convey his gratitude. But he can't, so he hopes his tone says enough.

 

Javier gives him another smile. He understands, he always does.

 

“Come on, since you were so insistent on cleaning up, help me carry these chairs back to the storage room,” he gestures with his head to the end of the hallway, already picking up a couple of chairs.

 

“It’s my birthday I shouldn’t be doing so much work” Yuzuru playfully grumbles under his breath.

 

“I can hear you!”

 

Yuzuru lets out a light laugh, picking up two chairs and following Javier.

 

Javier set the chairs down in the corner of the room and Yuzuru follows suit. He doesn’t realize how close he’s standing to Javier until he turns around. They both stop, a mere few inches separating the two of them.

 

Yuzuru waits for Javier to step back. He waits for him to make an offhanded comment and diffuse the tension that had suddenly blanketed the room.

 

But he doesn’t.

 

Instead, he stares at Yuzuru. His eyes, which are normally easy to read, are strangely serious. He looks torn, almost as if he were having an internal debate with himself.

 

Yuzuru feels frozen, suspended in time. The moment feels fragile, one wrong move and it could shatter.

 

Javier reaches out a hand, stopping just short of Yuzuru’s face, his fingertips ghosting his cheek. Yuzuru’s head moves on its own accord, his face turning slightly to bridge the gap that Javier had left.

 

Yuzuru feels strangely exposed, as if he has just bared his emotions out in the space in front of him for Javier to see.

 

"Javi I-" Yuzuru wants to say something more, do something more.

 

It’s Javier who moves first.

 

He steps forward, closing the space between them as he gently presses his lips against Yuzuru’s.

 

If Yuzuru could pick one moment to tuck into his pocket and carry around with him forever, it would be this one.

 

They break apart after a few seconds, both of them smiling at the other.

 

Yuzuru surges forward, wrapping his arms around Javier and burying his face in his neck.

 

Javier's arms circle his waist, holding him tightly.

 

Buried there, in Javier's warmth, Yuzuru thinks he's never felt more content. They stay there for a while, just holding each other, breathing the other person in.

 

Yuzuru is the first one to step away, albeit rather reluctantly.

 

Javier reaches down to squeeze his hands, “Happy Birthday Yuzu,” he whispers softly.

 

Yuzuru feels as if his heart could burst from the sheer joy he’s feeling.

 

Of course that’s also when his phone chooses to buzz.

 

Yuzuru pulls it out, it’s a text from his sister, asking him how his surprise party went. Yuzuru almost laughs, if only she knew.

 

Javier peers curiously at him, “Everything ok?”

 

“Perfect,” Yuzuru replies. He means it.

 

Yuzuru’s eyes stop on the clock hanging at the back of the room. He gasps. “Javi! Your session is soon! You must warm-up!”

 

Javier just shrugs, he seems in no hurry to leave.

Yuzuru pushes him out of the room. He refuses to be responsible for Javier being late.

"I must go home now, and you-" he points a finger at Javier's chest, "-have to train"

 

“You just don’t want to clean up anymore,”

 

“Well, you’re not wrong,”

 

Javier lets out a laugh at that.

 

Yuzuru thinks he could spend the rest of his life hearing him laugh and never get bored.

 

He takes another step back. "Goodbye Javi, thank you again."

 

“Are you still thanking me for the party? Or for something else?” Javier asks with a grin.

 

“For everything.”

 

Javier’s eyes soften, "It’s my pleasure." He turns, heading back toward the rink.

 

As Javier is walking away, Yuzuru spots another decoration, peeking out from behind the banner.

 

"Wait, Javi?" Yuzuru calls out.

 

Javier turns around again, "Yes?"

 

"Did you really buy me a balloon with Pooh on it?"

 

"Shut up."

 

Yuzuru's laugh follows Javier all the way inside the rink.

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully this wasn't too much of a mess, any comments/kudos are much appreciated :D


End file.
